Practicality and being special

I’ve hit my limit. I hate the term “poly saturated” but at least we all understand it. And I do hate it less than “my dance card is full.” I do not have enough days left in my month to add any new girls. Granted, spreading myself too thin is kind of what I do, but wife plus five is too many. I stop hunting when I hit somewhere around plus three. But I am very flirty, exceptionally charming, and more than a bit of a slutty whore, so I did get a couple of numbers and emails lately, some I would even be willing to follow up on (most notably one incredibly bright and super hot tattooed girl), but, as Alice said to the March Hare, “I’m sorry, but I just haven’t the time!”

This brings me to my real point. My recent ex asked me how special could she possibly be if she is one of five. Maybe it seems like since I see so many girls that I am indiscriminate. This is exactly the opposite of the truth! I see so many girls precisely because I am so damn picky. I do see a lot of girls. Having the freedom and the capability to act on potential relationships, though, doesn’t mean I will just pick women at random, indiscriminately. My set of standards is rigorous and fairly high. If a girl meets the barrier to entry and genuinely catches my attention, she is fairly stellar and it would be  a shame to pass up a chance to spend time with and be with a girl so remarkable.

Out of our fairly large Chicagoland metro poly and kink communities, I have met dozens and dozens, possibly hundreds, of eligible poly, non-monogamous, or otherwise available women. But out of all of those hordes of girls who I have met since we opened our marriage, nine have been worth the effort that a relationship would require, and two of those have been simply impractical. So that brings us to seven, including my two big breakups, which brings me down to five.

I am not running out of love like I have run out of free time. I love and love and love the people who are important to me. I am extremely lucky to have the kinds of relationships I have and the people in my life. Instead of looking at being “one girl of PMW’s five,” I look at these girls and think, “Wow, these five girls are such a special and rare treat. They truly are special, and in distinguished company.” Rather than being devalued because she is one of five, I hope she can see her like I see her, the elite, the few, the proud. Every one of the girls I see is very special and unique. My girlfriends… they’re the poly version of Seal Team Six. Then again, I can’t share any more details about Team Six. There is no Team Six.

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